At least make sure they are 18
Why
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Randomize
