Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
