I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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