About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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