All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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