So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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