maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
