My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
