in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
