just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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