Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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