i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
