carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
