I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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