I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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