what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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