Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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