White coat. Heels.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
