Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Operation Purity has been aborted
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
