ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
