u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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