i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
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