At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
