Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
