absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
