Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Randomize
