M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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