I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
