I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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