I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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