I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
