Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
