it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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