so that wasnt chicken after all
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Randomize
