pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
