8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
