tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize