you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
