You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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