So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
