Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
