Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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