i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
