No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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