I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
it glows. i had to have it.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
