Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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