These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
