I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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