there's paper in my vomit.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Randomize