What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize