just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
