is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
