The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Randomize
