I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
