Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize